Look kids it's a bankroll!

Last night we had dinner with Ron's parents. After a brief discussion on how we lost our measly bankroll in one night at Bay 101, we discovered that they have been holding a $5,000 bonus for us for perhaps over a year, waiting to give it to us. They said they would ask us how we were doing with money, and of course we say fine because we are doing fine (doesn't mean we don't want or need more), but since we said we were doing fine they just kept holding it in their sneaky little way. Now that we know this, whenever they ask about money again we are going to say "we are horribly poor".

Anyway, this means we have a $5,000 bankroll which is not bad at all. Now we are planning our run to $10,000...
I'm a bit gun shy after our big losing session on Sunday, but at the same time I keep telling Ron "give me some money and I will sit down and eat their souls!" Oh, I am quite competitive when I want to be. Also, our tax rebate check of $1200 will be here soon and be used for some needlework...

In other news, Isabelle is starting to look like a woolly mammoth and the art room will be put together tomorrow. Then next week, my new writer-artist schedule will begin. And a doctors appointment because I am starting to suspect I have asthma.

birthday

It's my darlings birthday. Tonight we are going out to PF Chang's for sake and dinner, then to cold stone and the midnight showing of Indiana Jones. I bought him a few things and of course I doubt and suffer in the thought that he won't like them, but we will see tonight...He is wonderful and I hope I can let him know how special he is.

This weekend the party sort of continues. We are going to get an ice cream cake, and also go play poker at Bay 101 on Sunday. We are excited to dabble in live poker again. A win would be the best present. A lose, will be a downtrodden trip to denny's then home for some whiskey and sleep. 

Last weekend we cleaned out our second bedroom turned garage. It was horrible and good and overwhelming. Now it is becoming my art room and all that is left is organizing all my art stuff the way I want, and decorating. I'm excited. I'm also getting a laptop to keep in there for writing, I can't wait to get started on a schedule of doing the things I love. It's a battle for me, but to do it, really do it. To devote, and write and create--images, feelings, pangs. This is what I want to do. Now to fight my damn self effacing and get, get to it.

In June we are going to Vegas for Ron to go to a conference. I will have several days alone, staying at the Rio while the WSOP is in progress. I'm so excited to be able to watch some of the events and troll the hotel for our favorite players. But I will miss Ron and hate to fill him in on the exciting details of my day when he spent his in a classroom listening to a nasally voiced instructor.

"all that I need to get me through this is a long vacation"

We went to Disneyland. We went because we were both horribly close to losing our minds from the stress of the situation. So we road tripped down and stayed at a next door motel and became kids again as we walked to the park. Ron getting too dizzy on the teacups, me being attacked by a giant moth on the Matterhorn. We remembered how to laugh, how to smile. We skipped, galloped, ate cotton candy and churros. We both forgot for a while, the creeping-curdled mess within me that comes out most at home. All that mattered was what ride to go on next, what sweet treat we wanted, how we were going to pose for pictures. On the way home we refocused, planned-prodded. And now here we are still determined and mostly rested. What a wonderful wish, dream come true. 

We are working on organizing the apartment and also confronting my parents. Last night we organized our patio storage unit and then to the office where we are going to set up a big writing space for me and perhaps soon buy me a laptop just for writing. I'm so excited, inspired, determined to get through it all and to the things I want. Writing, floristry, being a strong loving creative soul. 

Isabelle is sleeping on Ron's pillow with pouty lips, not wanting to wake up. Last night we got her a bark collar, she barked once and then jumped back terrified, then slowly creeping forward, lightly, gently, imagining some mean spirited creature had just attacked her. Poor thing. And today she is getting a bath, extra poor thing. 

Now to the day-- and tonight bbq-ing, and watching the playoffs.